Sunday, December 20, 2009

Breathless

She was comfortable in the sleeping bag, until now. The sudden chill forced her out of sleep. The wind was roaring outside and it sounded scary, she forced her eyes shut. The thought of her tent partner came to her mind. She might be awake, her heart raced as she tried to pull her head out of the sleeping bag, holding a number of times with fear. Her heart almost stopped when she found the tent was empty.

She wanted to scream. But she'd wanted to do many things now, first was to run away. But instead she pulled her head inside the bag again. She was shivering, it was freezing cold, but mostly the shivering was by fear. There would there be animals out there, wolf, bears, or...She trembled at the thought... or the ghosts. They say that they attack when you are the weakest mentally, the thought itself crept weakness through her heart. Sleep fled. C'mon buck up Rupa, she tried some encouragement but suddenly… she could sense some sudden changes. The wind seemed to be still like everything stopped, unlike few seconds ago, it also grew more cold. She held her breath. It's your mind playing games, stop it, she fired her mind…when she sensed a sudden movement, unnaturally rapid, near her. She feared even to exhale, still holding breath. Then suddenly, there was another speedy movement, this time not around, but through her. A sudden heavy force zapped through her head from her neck through her ear, and she felt a heavy pain, a momentarily dizziness. What is it ?

Her eyes were now flowing tears but she stayed still like a corpse. The coldness increased discreetly against her body. The chill senses was on and off as if some cold ones were around. She heard a sound, close sound, just inches from her face, a breathing sound to her left... Rather sniffing sound, the chillness now was somehow travelling toward her face. Another sniff to her right, then another... She knew they were close, pretty close and they were many... A whisper, her eyes flashed open and...

P.S : I thought to keep this open ended. I would like to invite my blogger friends to take this story further (those who wish). There are two things here to notice for the sequel -

1. What happens/sees when she open her eyes

2. And another thread, the ‘Whisper’ What could it be ?

So would you like to take the story further ? It would be fun to read the different interpretations. Let your imagination run wild... And don’t forget to comment the links it you write the sequel.

Dangling, was another story I’d write once, which I think was my wildest (or weirdest) imagination. Do check it.

8 comments:

  1. hmm... nice nice..
    i once wrote a ghost story..
    kinda like this
    but it happened to me in bangalore

    http://evilsfury.blogspot.com/2009/08/ghost-if-i-asked-you-do-you-believe-in.html

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    let me really think about this story..nice ..

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  2. Nice idea! I'll get back to this after my final :)

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  3. @Socerer & Mia
    Thanks for reading. Waiting for your versions of the story.

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  4. @Saurabh
    expecto patronum ? marathi, mazi english kachhi ahe..

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  5. This is completely off topic. I don't watch Bollywood movies much, but this is one movie I can't wait to watch. Love the simplicity and it looks like there is travel involved! I thought of showing it to you.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3IxoCG-pC4

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  6. you will understand my comment only if you've read harry potter

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  7. @mia
    ya, if you don't know it's Abhay Deol. You don't watch Bollywood movies ? I guess Akshay and SRk are quite famous there...

    @Saurabh
    Hmm...in that case i'll not understand as I havent read even 1 book :(

    btw you can explain it if you remember ;)

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